While I was battling cancer, a lot of people offered the advice that what I needed was a positive attitude. It didn’t take long until I found my hands curling into a fist whenever anyone started to spout this “wisdom.” A number of friends enthusiastically endorsed Dr. Christiane Northrup. Dr. Northrup advises women to “change the basic conditions of your life that lead to health problems.”

Just what are you suggesting, doctor? That I did something that made me get cancer???

That kind of advice isn’t empowering. It suggests that the ill aren’t just unfortunate. They’re guilty as well. Guilty of doing something that caused their illness. That’s not exactly what I call positive. Actually, it sounds rather medieval.

But now, almost six years after completing treatment, I’ve finally started looking at the whole positive attitude thing differently. I’m still no fan of Dr. Northrup at all. Because to me, it all sounds like, “You just have to look on the sunny side and you’ll be fine.” Certainly easy to say if you’re not standing in the shoes of a cancer patient.

No, my definition of having a positive attitude doesn’t involve smiling or thinking good thoughts. Instead, it’s about having a positive attitude about yourself. That your life is worth saving and living to its fullest. That you have something to contribute. That you are willing to do what it takes to get through this, even if that means being grumpy or rude, or sullen, or whatever. When it comes to fighting cancer, it really is a war. And, like they say, “All’s fair…”

People talke about cancer being a gift. Bull.

I’ve had more than one friend who’s battling cancer talk about feeling guilty about not being positive enough. That somehow they must avoid any negative thoughts. And that failing to do so is to invite doom into their lives. To tempt fate and ultimately cause their own demise.

The most empowering moment for me in my battle against cancer came a a low point, when I stood in the hallway of Dana-Farber Cancer Institute and shreiked obscenitites like a shrew at social workers (although I really wanted to be lambasting doctors.) I’ve also been sullen, stubborn, and blunt. No one was immune from my completely honest communication.

In the end, it looks like I’ve won. At least so far.

And you know what? Those same people who have been the objects of my rudeness and rage have since thanked me for teaching them how to be better caregivers. Better doctors. A more caring institute.

So, no, I’m not advocating random road rage. But sometimes being the wicked witch of the west can be more beneficial that trying to be little miss sunshine.

And that’s what I call positive.

It was odd. I wasn’t watching the DNC in Boston at all. Except one night, I turned on the TV. And there was Barack Obama.

At first I thought, “Who is this?” and then as I watched him speak, the tone of my question changed. More like, “(Wow!) Who is this????”

And as soon as he announced his candidacy for the presidency, I rushed to my computer to donate. I’m no longer alone, as evidenced by CNN’s political ticker story “Obama raises $7.2 million since Super Tuesday”.

But it got me thinking about two truths I’ve been espousing lately.

It’s always about the money.
It’s always personal.

But maybe, in this case, those two truths aren’t the cynical observations of someone who has watched too many polical campaigns. Maybe in this case, it’s personal because people feel involved and energized. And it’s about the power of that dedication and hope that has led to the funding frenzy.

I’ll only be the 10,000th blogger to compare Obama to JFK. Not because of their charisma. Not because of their youthful energy. Not because of the groundbreaking nature of their campaigns. But because both have acted as mirrors that reflect the best of us and dare us to reach our full potential. Both as individuals and as a country.

The famous JFK quote “Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country” is echoed in Obama’s web site with “I’m asking you to believe. Not just in my ability to bring about change in Washington… I’m asking you to believe in yours.”

So, this isn’t a new idea. Yet, there are so many example of people in power not getting it at all. Think Enron. Watergate. Iran-Contra. Yes, even Whitewater.

And that’s my problem with Hillary Clinton. She’s part of the political mentality that looks in the mirror and sees themselves. I beleive Barack Obama looks in the mirror and sees us. And we see ourselves in him. The best of ourselves.

And that’s personal.

After writing some blog entries for the company where I work (matchmine) and finishing my first non-software-related book (Trials), I’ve finally decided to jump in to the world of blogging for real.

So, as I was driving to work today, I thought about how the theme of personalization has converged in my life.

First off, I’m a cancer survivor. And the reason I’m alive is the vaccine made from my own tumor cells. It doesn’t get much more personal than that. And it worked – or at least seems to have. It’s been over 5 years and I’m still cancer-free.

Then, there’s matchmine, where I work as a tech writer. The whole notion of the company is to let you get personalized recommendations on music, movies, videos, and blogs based on what you like. There’s some pretty fancy math behind it. In fact, it’s the math that’s used in DNA research – so we’re back to the whole personalized medicine concept, applied to media recommendations. In fact, there’s a cool video in matchmine’s blog (““Our Higher Moral Purpose”) that talks about personalization and even mentions cancer research.

Then there’s this morning’s post on a discussion list I belong to about a documentary titled America in Chains.” It chronicles one man’s journey across the U.S. in which he tries to avoid doing business with big chains stores, including gas stations. You might wonder what this has to do with personalization. Well, I used to go to the local hardware store whenever I had a home repair problem. They gave me tons of advice, not because they were ordered to by corporate mandate. They just found solving problems interesting. Not just any problems. My problems. Unfortunately, they are no longer; instead there’s a “big box” store in its place. But maybe it’s time to seek and support the “little guys.” The ones who care enough to make it personal.

So I have to wonder. Are we about to enter the Age of Personalization? I hope so.